MY HAIKU LIFE – transcript
Text by Jessica Tremblay (oldpondcomics.com)

Kaeru:  Hi, my name is Kaeru and this is my Haiku Life. I was born in the pond on May 7 05 (05/07/05). I was just an egg, but my parents knew right away that I was different.

Parents look adoringly at a frog egg.
Kaeru (inside a frog egg): Haiku.
Parents look confused.

Kaeru: My parents didn`t know what a Haiku was so they went on the other side of the pond to ask an old frog named Kawazu.
Kaeru’s parents stand opposite Master Kawazu.
Mother (to Kawazu):  Uh….What’s a haiku?
Master Kawazu looks at them.
Kaeru (narrating): Kawazu explained that a haiku was a short poem from Japan that included a season word and used juxtaposition to convey, in only three lines, a sense of wonder or surprise.
Parents look confused by the explanation.
Kaeru (narrating): My parents didn't  understand a thing.

Mother (to Kawazu): Our son’s first word was: Haiku.  What does it means?
Kawazu: It means your son is meant to be a haiku poet.
Mother and Father gasp in horror.

Kaeru: Despite being a haiku poet, I had a normal childhood.
Kaeru looks at a butterfly fluttering by.

Kaeru: I went to regular school. My mom was very protective…
Mother gives Kaeru his lunch box.
Mother: Here.  And don`t talk to any poets on your way to school.   

Kaeru walking to school, afraid…

Kaeru: Everybody at the pond heard this horror story about a haiku poet who was looking for inspiration to write his haiku…

FLASHBACK - Basho (a haiku poet) walks around the pond.
Basho: Old Pond! Wait! Is the pond that old. Maybe I should ask somebody!

Kaeru (narrating): He needed help to finish a haiku, so he forced a frog to jump in the water.

BASHO (ANGRY): JUMP!!!!!!!

Kaeru (narrating) Just so he could hear the sound of the water.

Kaeru (to the camera): Creepy!!!

Kaeru: Ever since that time, frogs have been told to STAY AWAY from haiku poets.


Kaeru: At school, I got in trouble for submitting homework in a haiku form. 
Kaeru shows his homework to his mother. He got an F.

Kaeru: There was only one thing to do.

Father: Son, you’re going to haiku school.
Mother sobs.

Kaeru: My parents didn`t have money to send me to an actual haiku school, so instead they sent me on an apprenticeship with the only haiku master they knew.
Kaeru (smiling – on camera): And this is how I became the apprentice of a famous haiku master!
Awkward pause.
Master Kawazu is sitting next to Kaeru. Waiting.
Kawazu: Are you done? Can we go on with the haiku lesson, now?
Kaeru: sure.
Kawazu (showing a piece of paper): how many syllables in this haiku?
Kaeru: 17.
Kawazu: and this one?
Kaeru: 17
Kawazu: And this one?
Kaeru : Can I do something else than count the syllables of your haiku?
Kawazu: Do you want to count the number of lines?
Kaeru sighs.
Kaeru (looks at the haiku): three.
Kawazu : and this one.
Kaeru: three lines.
Kawazu: And this one?
FADE OUT.